Yes Ma'm
by IcyBlueCatastrophe
Summary: After all those beatings from his pregnant wife , he's still Uchiha Sasuke , and HE.DOES.NOT.CRY. Okay, maybe once.Oneshot. SasuSaku //For Sakura's B-Day


Another oneshot? Funny how I came up with this..I called my sister fat and then she whacked my head!Seriously Hurts.

**Disclaimer**:I don't own Naruto

* * *

_Once upon a time , _

_There was a mighty Uchiha._

_The last of the Uchihas in fact_

_He was so powerful , some people were even scared of him._

_And he had a very beautiful wife._

_With pink hair and emerald eyes.._

_But , sadly his wife got pregnant..._

_Dear journal , my wife , Sakura , is pregnant for 6½.Her cravings and emotional changes are killing is seriously annoying as single day she asks me to get her something to eat and satisfy her for the time .Maybe I shouldn't got her pregnant in the first she made me get her a grape jelly filled donut I got back , she didn't eat it!_

_And I wasted 3 hours finding that stupid donut.I regret having my wife pregnant , but I've come a long way so I can't give up now, only 2½ more months. We still don't know if it's a boy or girl. Sakura wanted it to be a surprise. She already thought up names!_

"Sasuke-kun!!"

_Shit , that's her calling me , I don't really want to go but I have to. Also I learned a few lessons on how to deal with a pregnant wife._

_Goodbye journal , see you in the next few hours._

_Sasuke_

...

_Rule No.1 : Don't be slow in getting her stuff , while your doing it , don't look annoyed/angry/mad/ or whatever._

...

"What now Sakura?" Sasuke asked his wife , the tone in his voice cleary annoyed.

"I want...an Nauto's pork flavored ramen.."Sakura pouted.

"Fine."Sasuke began stomping to the door until he heard his wife's cries

"S-sasuke d-d-doesn't w-want m-m-me!!" Sakura cried while wiping her tears with her hands.

"Hush..what made you think that?"Sasuke said , his tone a little bit softer.

"Y-you looked a-anoyyed!Y-you d-don't want m-m-me!" Still wiping her tears

Sasuke kissed her , soon tears stop smiled."Thanks Sasuke-kun."After at least 5 minutes she turned angry " Uchiha Sasuke! Where the hell is my ramen?!"Sakura shouted in his poor then left to watch TV.

"I better get them in 5 minutes or I'm going to rip up your journal , yes I know you have a journal , and _accidentally _burn it while practicing fire jutsus!"Sakura shouted all the way from the living room.

Now , Sasuke really need to get to Naruto's.

* * *

Sasuke didn't hesitate to open the door , he just walked right in , knowing it was unlocked.

"Dobe I need your pork flavored ramen. Now."Sasuke hissed to his ramen eating smirked.

"Yeah sure wait just one minute."Naruto accidentally couldn't find his ramen.

Finally after ten minutes or what it seems, he tossed Sasuke his last pork flavored ramen.

"Dobe , you know she was craving for it , and you know she's going to kill me for taking so long cause' you accidentally couldn't find your ramen!" Naruto flashed a grin towards his best friend and then chuckled."Hey payback for last time when Hinata was pregnant!"And Sasuke walked out the door.

Yup , Naruto is married to Hinata 2 years after she confessed to him. And they have a son , what a cute little family , right?

* * *

_Rule No.2_ : _Do NOT wake your wife up when she's sleeping.( Pokes are hard. Better use some protection.)_

"Sakura! Sakura! I got your ramen! Where are you?" Sasuke yelled to the silent house that is now not silent anymore.

" SHUT UP! I was _trying_ to sleep , but _no_ you just _had _to yell just because you got my food that I wanted , well you know what?!?! You can throw away that stupid ramen! I don't want it anymore and next time , please let me have my beauty sleep!" Sakura growled poking Sasuke in the chest very hard.

Sasuke gulped he was seriously scared of his wife. AND he's Uchiha Sasuke! The feared survior of the Uchiha clan , ex-missing nin ,ANBU Captain, taught under one of The Sannins , and The Copy Nin Hatake Kakashi!

Everyone was in fear of him. He would kill without hesitation. He would slaughter in missions, along with his bestfriend , kill hundreds of bad people! And yet , here he was scared of his wife. Pregnant wife at that.

* * *

_Hello journal_

_It's me, the past few hours were hell to me. She poked my chest , seriously hard. It's forming a bruise!She even threaten to burn you because I was slow at getting her some things!Seriously hot tempered woman._

_I'm tired journal , but I don't think I can sleep in the same bed as her. Last night , she even choked me in her dreams , mumbling 'Sasuke , if the baby isn't a girl, i'm gonna kill you!' One scary woman._

_But , Sakura is a little less scary than Hinata when she got her pregnancy , I feel sorry for the Dobe. I'm going to sleep see you later ( or way later ) journal_

_Your owner, _

_Sasuke_

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_Rule No.3 : Don't go out too much , she might assume your cheating on her._

"S-sasuke-kun! Where have you been? I was alone Sasuke! I was alone!" Sakura came running to hug her husband.

Sasuke only sighed. He couldn't even leave the house .

"A-are y-you cheating on me?"Sakura whispered with her voice a little low , she looked down to the ground.

"What?! No I'm not , why do you think so?"Sasuke captured her in his arms, hugging her.

A few tears came pouring down her jade eyes."Cause' you go out to much , and when your not here I feel something bad."

"I would never cheat on you , I love you too much to even walk out on you.."He whispered to her , his voice low.

Sakura stopped crying,"Then where were you?"Sasuke sighed, remembering where he was.

"I was with the dobe , he introduced me to Icha Icha series , the porn book Kakashi always read , but-" Sasuke smirked before he continued,"Hinata smacked him right in the face with a pan."

Sakura laughed full hearted."Did you?"She asked curious if Sasuke read the porn yet.

"Nope." He grunted, but it kind of sound like a chuckle.

Sakura laughed once again.

Wasn't she just crying? And now she's laughing! Sakura's emotional 'issues' are annoying , but Sasuke can just tolerate it sometimes.

* * *

_Dear journal , _

_It's Sasuke , your owner. only one more month till her due date.I have to say I'm clearly excited.I wonder if it's a boy. I want it to be a boy , but a girl is fine. Today I'm going to take Sakura out to a picnic. Since she practically made me. It was so hard to resist her puppy eyes. Not even Akatsuki can resist it._

_I wonder what she's going to wear, better be something just asked me these non stop questions. Once again. Annoying._

_I still have 10 minutes until the picnic. I look ridiculous. I'm currently writing in my journal while wearing white knee length shorts , a black Tee shirt that quotes - 'My Jutsus' bring ya'll to the yard',ninja sandals, and a couple hat that's black with a white Haruno and Uchiha symbol._

_Here comes Sakura , she looks absolutely delicious. Wearing white pregnancy dress with the couple hat - white instead of black and the symbols are black instead of white , and her awesome ninja boots._

_Okay , she's calling me, Until next time journal._

_Sasuke_

...

_Rule No.4: Do not call her fat or you'll regret it._

Sasuke and Sakura are currently eating on the cloth that was spread out on the open and silently eating until Sakura decided to break the silence with a question.

"Sasuke, do I look fat?"Sakura asked , waiting for an answer.

Sasuke gulped , this was the hardest question so far , if he said yes , she would beat him to death. But if he said no , she would assume he's trying to lie and beat him went with the first.

"Kinda..."

"I knew it!! I knew you think I'm fat! How could you Uchiha Sasuke don't you dare say I'm fat! Look at yourself in the mirror your fat yourself!"Sakura continued punching him and hitting him with the bread she was holding.

Sasuke wasn't really fat or anything - hell! He even got a six-pack!

"Ow! Ow! Ouc- God dammit woman! Control yourself!Ouch Ouch!"Sasuke was just being hit continually with her fist and the bread.

_WHACK!!!_

Sakura have used two breads...poor Sasuke. After that fit...Sasuke had a lot of bruise on his face while Sakura was just sobbing , "I'm fat I'm fat I'm fat I'm fa-" she didn't get to finish that last one since Sasuke just kissed her to shut her up.

After the heated kiss , Sasuke smirked, "Your not fat."

_WHACK!!!_

"The hell was that for!?" Sasuke rubbed the now new bruise on his head

"I just feel like it."Sakura kept on giggling the whole picnic.

* * *

_Rule No.5: Do not make her more nervous than she already is on her final week._

"And when your in the hospital make you push real hard , but not too hard since it hurts like make sure to bite onto hold my hand real hard when you push. And don't think of the pain when those needles test your blood or something. And last of all , make sure you don't get nervous." Sasuke kept on ranting and ranting.

"Sasuke! Your making me nervous than I am!What if I can't do it?! Oh god!"Sakura punched Sasuke with one of her chakra god , it hurts like hell.

Sakura by now is crying cause' she keeps on thinking the cons during the thing.

"Shh...it's gonna be okay , I'll be there remember? I'll threaten Tsunade to send only the best for 's not going to hurt kay'?"Sasuke muttered while hugging her.

"Oh sure and this is coming from the guy that said all the bad stuff of this just 5 minutes ago? Sure I believe you."Sakura giggled , giving him playful punch on his shoulders , still hurts like hell.

...

"Ouch!!"

_And how Uchiha Sasuke have fallen..._

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Finished?

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Review?

Please?


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